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Not a psych person, but what you're describing sounds like what I understand of borderline personality, who have a lot of anxiety and dysfunction around attachment, often because of primary caregivers messing that up in their childhoods.
A detrans youtuber I just watched says basically she detransed because she missed getting dolled up- can't do that as a guy. She's conventionally beautiful, and dolls up to be sexually appealing while saying she's aromantic/asexual. I am super confused as it must get her tons...
of supposedly unwanted sexual invitations. Just wondered if some of what you were talking about it is in play there- the approach/avoidance thing
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