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People who want their every personal choice to be evidence of liberation, and deeply distrust everyone else who have slightly more normative priorities in life, are silly people.
And from personal experience they will be v needy, crisis prone friends right up till the time they flip on you and decide they’d like to cause some crises for you.
Fascinating observations.
Not a psych person, but what you're describing sounds like what I understand of borderline personality, who have a lot of anxiety and dysfunction around attachment, often because of primary caregivers messing that up in their childhoods.
The way I know exactly who this person in my own life is. 
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