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One difference in temperament I find fascinating is the ability to orient one’s choices to potential preferred futures. The common wisdom is “oh you need a complete frontal cortex for that,” but actually you start to see differences in this ability even between 8 year olds.
I remember being in high school + talking to a friend who always did her homework RIGHT when she got home. She said “if i waited I’d just worry about it till I got it done.” My mind was blown- to consider the event of homework as something that impacted me beyond the event.
You can chalk this up to my ADHD, but also I think caregivers noticing and praising a kid for connecting the dots btw present and future is v powerful. Getting out of living in an “endless now” is a skill to learn.
Here’s an over the top middle aged thing to say: if kids’ media focused on the message of “plan ahead and follow through on your plans” as much as it does “Be you! Express yourself!” we’d have happier kids w/ higher self esteem.
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