At some point we will have to discuss what it does to daughters to be treated as mom’s doll.
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How you engage with your daughter’s inner life is how she will engage with that inner life as an adult. So if you want her to be self-compassionate and self-reflective you have to treat her thoughts and emotions with compassion and interest.
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It’s hard to do for one’s child what one hasn’t done for oneself. Have you ever read the famous study, Ghosts in the Nursery? Illuminating about how trauma is passed through the generations.
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My mom always told me this is the job of a therapist, not hers. I assumed moms didn't typically do that, that's interesting to hear...
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No.....no modeling and teaching children how to respond to their own emotional experiences with compassion, interest and maturity is part of parenting. Therapists do a lot of re-parenting, but kids should not be expected to know how to do that w/o being taught by caretakers.
End of conversation
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I raised my daughter as my best friend!
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