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There are def parents w/ the instinct “I love you so my job is to keep you happy” vs. parents w/ the instinct “I love you so I’m making sure you have the skills to get what you want as an adult.”
Skills your kid needs as an adult: -ability to choose their battles -eating/moving/sleeping in ways that support their health -respectfully asking for help -getting along w/authority figures -asserting boundaries with both the sane and insane
Your kid v probably will need to hold down a job to support themselves- are you setting them up to have the skills to do that?
I’m increasingly convinced that the modern parent’s reliance on their kid for emotional intimacy gets in the way of their ability to parent. Being at peace when yr kid is furious w/ you is absolutely necessary for the basics of parenting.
Your kid does actually prefer to subsist on soda, stay up all night talking to strangers on the internet, never moving and never developing skills valuable to the larger world. So quit thinking the opposite is going to happen without them being uncomfortable and angry at you.
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