Your Pal, Cal

@Calamanderr

Blotto, Stolid, Writer.

Joined June 2011
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  1. Retweeted
    Apr 4

    Me as a kid walking into the Scholastic Book Fair with $5

    442 replies 68,110 retweets 226,622 likes
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  2. Apr 4

    Oh my word.

    Reports now are that Amazon is committing $1B over 5 seasons for the Lord of the Rings TV series. ONE BILLION DOLLARS. This would make LOTR the biggest series in television history, and PETER JACKSON is in discussions now.
    1 reply 6 likes
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  3. Apr 4

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  4. Mar 29

    If Davenport was in Game of Thrones our house banner would be the River Bandits logo. We're dirty but we are survivors.

    2 replies 3 retweets 11 likes
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  5. Retweeted
    Mar 28

    429 replies 19,696 retweets 52,386 likes
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  6. Mar 20

    RhiNooooooo ☹

    His death leaves the subspecies with only two remaining individuals, and critically closer to extinction
    2 likes
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  7. Retweeted
    Mar 14

    Stephen Hawking’s final Reddit comment is worth reading.

    102 replies 14,672 retweets 29,109 likes
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  8. Retweeted
    Mar 13

    The way this world works is beyond me.

    Married couple in China discover they appeared in same photograph as teenagers: Report
    396 replies 175,825 retweets 532,213 likes
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  9. Mar 13

    Need to buy nose trimmers, feeling real old about now.

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  10. Retweeted
    Mar 6

    "You look weary traveler, come rest a spell. I have tonics and elixirs for sale if you have the coin" *BUY *ASK *LEAVE

    442 replies 22,658 retweets 60,255 likes
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  11. Retweeted
    Mar 4

    After Road House and Bad Boys II got snubbed the Oscars kinda lost its integrity. No thanks. Don't need your input on what "good" movies are.

    10 replies 248 retweets 565 likes
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  12. Mar 3

    I will own a flip phone next week.

    4 likes
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  13. Retweeted
    Mar 2

    I asked if the first public screening of could be in my hometown of Compton. They created a theater experience with fab sound + picture quality out of a community center since there are no movie theaters in Compton. I thank them. And these kids do too.

    536 replies 15,832 retweets 74,365 likes
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  14. Retweeted
    Mar 2

    FDR: “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” JFK: “Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country.” Donald Trump:

    Alec Baldwin, whose dying mediocre career was saved by his terrible impersonation of me on SNL, now says playing me was agony. Alec, it was agony for those who were forced to watch. Bring back Darrell Hammond, funnier and a far greater talent!
    1,884 replies 25,579 retweets 97,368 likes
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  15. Retweeted
    Feb 27

    This was a real show in Japan about a Samurai who refused to kill a cat he was hired to kill. I had to post the extremely good promo gallery for Twitter.

    1,138 replies 44,151 retweets 116,028 likes
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  16. Feb 26

    Big Ern McCracken

    0:25
    "WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? I AM!" On this date in 2012, a catchphrase was born.
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  17. Retweeted
    Feb 23

    Overheard a woman say very angrily on the phone “I married a stale ham sandwich of a human” and calling someone a stale ham sandwich is probably my new favorite insult

    561 replies 47,165 retweets 264,479 likes
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  18. Feb 23

    "How's your mother?" "She's on her way out." "We all are, act accordingly."

    3 likes
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  19. Retweeted
    Feb 23

    All the important issues of the day like breadsticks.

    1 retweet 1 like
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  20. Retweeted
    Feb 20

    Walton Goggins to star in CBS' LA Confidential drama pilot

    15 replies 44 retweets 183 likes
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