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BootlegGirl's profile
Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.
Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.
Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.
@BootlegGirl

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Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.

@BootlegGirl

PhD, Texas A&M, 2015. Software worker. Data nerd. My views are my own and never represent any employer.

Winona, MN, USA
ellielockhart.github.io
Joined August 2013

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    1. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

      Since it's out today and I HATE ALL LIFE and CANNOT SLEEP, I am going to watch and live tweet THE MOVIE THAT RUINED MY AND ALSO YOUR LIFE

      5 replies 2 retweets 46 likes
      Show this thread
    2. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

      God I hate this movie, and all life

      3 replies 1 retweet 18 likes
      Show this thread
    3. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

      We live in a virus stricken hellscape where we are forbidden physical contact with others lest we spread the deadly disease which our leaders ignore in order to advance their cruel and vile designs And we still had new Star Wars And now we have this

      1 reply 1 retweet 13 likes
      Show this thread
    4. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

      I hope this hell is as bad for you as it is for me, Abrams

      1 reply 0 retweets 13 likes
      Show this thread
    5. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

      God even the opening crawl is broken "Meanwhile SUPREME LEADER KYLO REN rages in search of the phantom emperor, determined to destroy any threat to his power" TO WHOSE, JJ? TO KYLO'S OR SHEEV'S? LAST I CHECKED THEY BOTH USED HE/HIM/HIS

      2 replies 0 retweets 31 likes
      Show this thread
    6. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

      KYLO: *looks at objective bar* Kill 19/20 Sith Eternal Cultists 20TH SITH ETERNAL CULTIST: *dies* *Nearby object begins to glow, signalling Kylo to turn in the quest*

      2 replies 2 retweets 27 likes
      Show this thread
    7. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

      PALPATINE: Snoke trained you well ME: WHY??? WHY DIDN'T YOU TRAIN HIM? WHAT WAS THE FCKING POINT OF SNOKE? EVERYTHING ELSE HAS AN ANSWER BUT THIS, EVEN IF IT'S A FCKING STUPID ANSWER

      2 replies 0 retweets 28 likes
      Show this thread
    8. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

      WHY DO THEY STILL HAVE A VAT OF SNOKES??? IS THE PLAN THAT LIKE, WHEN IT'S ALL OVER, PALPATINE WILL BE LIKE "COME WITH ME, SNOKE, WE CAN HAVE A CREEPY ASS ROMANCE" AND THEN SNOKE'S ARM COMES OFF AND RITSUKO SHOOTS THEM

      3 replies 1 retweet 30 likes
      Show this thread
      Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

      PALPATINE: the First Order was just the beginning. I will give you so much more KYLO: Like what PALPATINE: the Second Order. The Third Order. A whole quest chain. First, I need you to gather five Sith-jaguar pelts

      7:16 AM - 14 Mar 2020
      • 4 Retweets
      • 46 Likes
      • Colorado Cat House Denizen Antônio Possidônio Campos Neto gorn wedding planner; Squid Lake enthusiast Master Beef Producer Joseph Hewitt (Will Table When Tables) J. Wolff (he/him)💙 Saoirse the Gay ass Gorgon Parsifal Seere pasuht
      2 replies 4 retweets 46 likes
        1. New conversation
        2. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          KYLO: what could you give me SHEEV: more Star Destroyers KYLO: my opponents have one (1) ship SHEEV: MORE STAR DESTROYERS

          1 reply 1 retweet 29 likes
          Show this thread
        3. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          SHEEV: KILL THE GIRL! END THE JEDI! BECOME WHAT YOUR GRANDFATHER ... ... ... VADER ... ... COULD NOT KYLO: thank you I forgot who my grandfather was until now, that explains my outfit and general life choices

          1 reply 0 retweets 36 likes
          Show this thread
        4. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          REY: so last year, in an ironic subversion after my late mentor told me that my path wasn't all about lifting rocks, it turned out that in one specific situation I really did benefit from my skill at boulder mobilization REY:so the lesson I took from that is REY:always lift rocks

          1 reply 0 retweets 34 likes
          Show this thread
        5. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          REY: I didn't finish the training course because Kylo was touching the Vader helmet and breathing heavily PILOT: hi, the Falcon hasn't arrived. Also I'm gay, this movie should be about me CARRIE FISHER: if I could record more voice over, I would agree

          1 reply 0 retweets 25 likes
          Show this thread
        6. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          PILOT: Rey! Falcon's back! REY: Also you're gay PILOT: yes! In a more interesting movie I would replace you REY: but this movie sucks PILOT:on the upside I heard your relationship with Kylo is "just friends" REY:WHAT PILOT: it's canon! Just hets being jets PILOT: my wife is canon

          1 reply 0 retweets 21 likes
          Show this thread
        7. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          REY: I HELD HANDS WITH HIM PILOT: *shrug* REY: I will KISS HIM after he RESURRECTS ME! PILOT: you know kids can get really confused by seeing different sexualities depicted PILOT: when you and Kylo get a bit older you can decide if it's romantic REY: HE'S 32!!!

          1 reply 1 retweet 18 likes
          Show this thread
        8. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          PILOT: look I'm just saying people have had enough of you people reading in sexual stuff where it isn't there PILOT: anyway go over and talk with the other forced heteros on the Falcon, I'm gonna make out with my wife

          1 reply 1 retweet 16 likes
          Show this thread
        9. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          POE, at meeting that evening: we've decoded the info from the First Order spy, and it confirms the worst *long pause as he directly mimics Alec Guinness rolling his eyes at dialogue in A New Hope* POE:Somehow REY:What POE:Somehow PILOT: I have a wife to sexually make out w Poe

          1 reply 0 retweets 12 likes
          Show this thread
        10. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          POE: somehow LEIA: the Dark Side is very bad REY: Not now, recorded Leia REY: seriously what Poe POE: somehow... I can't say it FINN: you have to say it POE: by Grabthar's Hammer FINN: NOT THAT LINE

          1 reply 1 retweet 20 likes
          Show this thread
        11. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          POE, dying inside: somehowpalpatinereturned ACKBAR JR.: impossible! He's dead VERY NERDY BACKGROUND GUY: well actually, I read Dark Empire and - REY: wait the Empire wasn't dark before NERDY GUY: look, dark science. Cloning. REY: those aren't answers NERD: HEARTBORN! SEVENTH SEE

          2 replies 3 retweets 20 likes
          Show this thread
        12. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          POE: ok so look I know this is stupid but tactically it matters. He's been building something called the Final Order. The largest fleet the Galaxy has ever known PILOT: Poe, we currently have precisely one (1) light Corellian freighter. Why does that make a difference? POE: AAAAA

          1 reply 0 retweets 13 likes
          Show this thread
        13. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          POE: in sixteen hours, the Emperor and his fleet begin attacks on all free worlds POE: the Galaxy is exactly sixteen hours across POE: ...anyway, I'm Poe Dameron, and today is the longest day of my life EVENTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME 15:59:59 15:59:58

          4 replies 1 retweet 27 likes
          Show this thread
        14. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          REY: I'm going to the forbidden desert of Hexgarth POE: me too REY: I have to go alone FINN: alone with friends! REY: Finn, you realize you're not Adventure Time Finn POE: Rose, you coming? ROSE: no, unlike the rest of you I know I'm supposed to be practicing SOCIAL DISTANCING

          2 replies 5 retweets 47 likes
          Show this thread
        15. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          LEIA, embracing Rey: Rey, never be afraid of who you are REY: Why would I be? LEIA: oh I didn't mean to say you should REY: Kind of seemed implied LEIA: I mean we have heterosexuals here. A lot of them! So it's okay! To be straight! LEIA: or very unrelatedly the child of a Sith

          1 reply 1 retweet 23 likes
          Show this thread
        16. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          MEANWHILE KYLO REN: Ape Man, make me a helmet APE MAN:didn't you crush the last helmet I made for you in a fervent rejection of your whole aesthetic KYLO: that doesn't matter now. I feel like some universal force is telling me I need to be able to speak without my lips being seen

          2 replies 4 retweets 28 likes
          Show this thread
        17. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          KYLO: General Hux, I sense unease. It's the mask right? Not the decapitated head I'm carrying? HUX: definitely, I have no reason to worry about that REASONABLE GENERAL GUY: but sir, these Sith Eternal seem creepy KYLO: they have Star Destroyers RGG: again, the Rebels have 1 SHIP

          1 reply 0 retweets 15 likes
          Show this thread
        18. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          POE: 3P0, you sure we're at the right Podunk desert? 3P0: oh yes, Master Dameron. Master Luke left behind the exact coordinates of Space Burning Man, the only place to find secrets of Rey's past REY: What 3P0: I mean... The only place to find .. coordinates... I'll be going

          2 replies 1 retweet 18 likes
          Show this thread
        19. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          REY: I really like Space Burning Man. You think we could score some spice? POE: why would you ask me that? REY: I just mean - POE: THIS UNIVERSE IS SUDDENLY MORE RACIST THAN IT ALREADY WAS

          1 reply 3 retweets 24 likes
          Show this thread
        20. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          ALIEN: *doing a ritual with kid aliens* REY: 3P0, what's she saying? 3P0: she is telling them the history of their families 3P0: none of which are Palpatine ALIEN:zee goomba no sarkon 3P0: she is asking what your family name is, and notes she assumes it is not "PALPATINE" REY:yes

          2 replies 0 retweets 15 likes
          Show this thread
        21. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          KYLO: speaking of Palpatine, i'm supposed to kill you for him. It's in my quest log REY: You'll probably just win the fight when I hit 1 HP and then we'll have a cutscene KYLO: yes. A steamy romantic one probably REY: I've been told we're just friends KYLO: whaaaat

          1 reply 1 retweet 21 likes
          Show this thread
        22. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          REY: but no I mean what if the whole offering hands and Forcetiming and stuff was a healthy platonic relationship KYLO: ... REY: do we have to force the heterosexual agenda on everything? KYLO: I want to kiss you REY: but like, as a friend. A murder friend! It's natural!

          1 reply 4 retweets 21 likes
          Show this thread
        23. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          KYLO: you! Female officer! Analyze these arts and crafts I stole from my girlfriend OFFICER: I think you're reading a sexual element in that's just not there KYLO: I'll kill you OFFICER: she's at Space Burning Man KYLO: excellent.

          1 reply 3 retweets 21 likes
          Show this thread
        24. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          STORMTROOPER: I've found the Resistance fugitives, while blending in at Burning Man in my fascist armor that doesn't filter out smoke or its effec- *takes arrow to face* LANDO: quick, get in my very slow tank that I brought to Burning Man somehow

          1 reply 0 retweets 19 likes
          Show this thread
        25. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          3P0: Rey, this is Lando Cal- REY: 3P0, I've seen the original trilogy! Shut up!

          2 replies 0 retweets 12 likes
          Show this thread
        26. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          *chase begins* 3P0: Mistress Rey, it appears that the First Order have reinvented the wheel REY: I'm not sure what you mean POE: he means they re-invented wheels REY: were wheels ever invented to start with FINN: WHO CARES

          1 reply 0 retweets 11 likes
          Show this thread
        27. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          Ok, I can't take any more of this movie for today. Will resume thread later

          2 replies 0 retweets 14 likes
          Show this thread
        28. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          Existence is misery - Abrams taught me that

          2 replies 0 retweets 14 likes
          Show this thread
        29. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          There's no possible way someone could know how to start a vehicle without a key besides being a secret drug dealer, especially not when they're a master behind the enemy lines spy

          1 reply 3 retweets 14 likes
          Show this thread
        30. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          REY: look! It's the ship! The ship from my backstory! POE: distracted driving Rey! *speeder crashes and explodes* VOICEOVER:this has been a PSA brought to you by the Distracted Speeder Driving Association of the Galaxy. Even if it's your secret stupid backstory CHORUS:IT CAN WAIT

          1 reply 3 retweets 13 likes
          Show this thread
        31. Dr. Ellie Lockhart. Republic serial villain.‏ @BootlegGirl 14 Mar 2020

          REY, sinking in quicksand with literally all her friends: BB8! My one friend who doesn't need to breath! NO! I AM CONCERNED FOR YOU IN PARTICULAR!

          1 reply 1 retweet 20 likes
          Show this thread
        32. Show replies

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