My relationship with my mother has always been strained and it seems like everyoneeeeee knew except her.
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She's abusive & manipulative and now that I don't live with her, I have noooo reason to interact with her and somehow that's made me "bad".
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I just don't get how you think you can raise a person and not understand why they view you the way they view you. There's a disconnect.
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Especially if they explicitly tell you "you were abusive, this is why I choose not to interact with you". How you finna ignore that?
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It's amazing the lengths people will go to in order to uphold false memories. To the point of delusion. To the point of isolation.
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Like I have two parents. Both of whom didn't do completely right by me. At least my damn dad admits his absence was harmful.
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But what do you tell the parent that was there that they still fucking sucked at the job? Like. lol
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Parents need to stop thinking that being physically THERE and your kid not needing food/water/clothing/housing is enough.
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Children are human beings. Not fucking pets that will be loyal to you once they're old enough to realize you sucked at the parenting shit.
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They will remember everything you made them feel. And you'll have to answer to that one day. Why is holding parents accountable bad?
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Why when you confront parents with their shortcomings are you met with feelings of nonchalance.
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I've honestly come to the conclusion that healing for me might not include healing with my mother. Healing might mean moving on.
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And I'm just gonna have to be okay with that because the other option is subjecting myself to more abuse for the sake of a flawed rship.
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It took me being 20 to actually see the dynamic I had with my mother for what it really was. Toxic. 20 years.
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It's taken me another 5 years to attempt to establish boundaries and build up a resistance to the toxicity.
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Another year to actually DISTANCE myself from my mother and I've gotten to the breaking point where I know there's nothing else I have to do
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Everybody's process is DIFFERENT. Everybody's lessons here on this earth are different. Don't you dare let anybody dictate yours.
End of conversation
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Wow..lol..u just basically explained my life haha..therapy helped me a lot..u just have to forgive and be content with healing w/o her
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Yup. When I was in therapy she told me that. Takes a while to really come to terms with letting go. Especially of mom.
End of conversation
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Are you an only child too?
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