At least, when shi had the evening off from hir Mistress, which shi usually did. X never really... Well, it was sex repulsed. Or, sex disinterest. The exact details of the acts never interested it. It was just that it wanted to know. Not what the sex was like but what Adi /felt/.
-
-
Prikaži ovu nit
-
X never asked though. Not yet. It was just- it didn't want anyone to think that it had been leading folks around, playing at being disinterested, not truly sex-disinterested. Not really itself. But as it had gotten to know Adi... It started to feel more comfortable.
Prikaži ovu nit -
Adi didn't judge. Shi just listened. And accepted what shi was told, with complete confidence in X. Was that hir? Or part of hir drone programming? Or was there even a distinction to be made? X broke into a whisper. "Hey, Adi?"
Prikaži ovu nit -
The drone kitty turned hir head, given all hir limbs except for hir tail where leaned up against side of the couch ("It's comfy" shi said.). "Yea X? What's up?" The lizard fidgeted a little. "Is it okay, if you're comfortable, to ask you about, about you being a drone?"
Prikaži ovu nit -
Adi smiled. "X, I'd love to answer your questions. You can ask about me any time you want, you're my friend." It felt its anxiety melt away immediately. Adi would understand. "I was wondering, what it felt like. Not, physically, but the way you think?"
Prikaži ovu nit -
Adi's smile broadened. "Oh, you're wanting to get at the actual core of what being a drone is about, huh?" Shi paused, gathering hir thoughts. "You don't notice, at first. Because it's drawing on your own needs. Your own wants and desires. Everything becomes natural."
Prikaži ovu nit -
"Tasks, thought processes, when you even notice you're doing them, they feel so easy, effortless, like you're gliding through water. And once you're done doing something there's this sense of satisfaction that lingers, fading into the next task, the next feeling of satisfaction."
Prikaži ovu nit -
"There's clarity in thought, not because they're gone but because they're not messy any more. I can feel scared, but I understand immediately that I should understand why I'm scared and find a safe way to confront what's scaring me. I can feel sad, and simply know to reach out."
Prikaži ovu nit -
"And with the clarity comes confidence. It isn't blind. It's the confidence to be okay with not knowing what to do, to be okay with making mistakes, and not getting locked into circular thoughts of despair or anxiety, to go and get help or knowledge or simply fix things."
Prikaži ovu nit -
"And you're still there. Not beneath all this but in it, just living in the moment, every moment, so that without the interruptions and stalled cognitive processes 'you' becomes this cool brook, flowing through reality, not minding the rocks beneath you, inside you."
Prikaži ovu nit -
The drone cocked hir head to the side. "I'm sorry if I kind of trailed off there, but I'm not sure there's a better way to describe it short of experiencing it. Was I at least able to give you an idea?" X started, having been engrossed in pondering what its friend had said.
Prikaži ovu nit -
"It's fine, you did really well, actually. Thank you," X opened its mouth to say something else. Closed it. Opened it again. "It sounds nice. Relieving, even. It must feel really good to you." A soft smile from Adi. "Thank you. Being a drone isn't for everyone..."
Prikaži ovu nit -
“... But I wouldn’t give it up for the world. It’s who I am.” X smiled back at hir. “You’re a great drone. And a great friend. You mean a lot to me.” Adi grinned, eyes watering behind her visor. “If I wasn’t a pillow right now I’d have smooched you so hard Karen would feel it.”
Prikaži ovu nit -
“Settle for letting me use you for your ‘intended purpose?’” offered the lizard. Adi sniffed, eyes shining with happiness. “... Get your head over and get your sleep on, nerd~” X didn’t hesitate- the kittie’s belly fur was the softest pillow it e v e r . . .
Prikaži ovu nit -
CW “Painting your claws? Again? I thought you said you were going to be a boy now.” “It’s more complicated than that dad.” “What, painting your nails? And wearing leggings?” “Look, dad it’s my style.” “... I just don’t think you’re taking this transsexual business seriously.”
Prikaži ovu nit -
CW “I am! Can you just trust me?” “Listen, Chel- /Xander/. I want what’s best for you, and people are going to /judge/ you for the way you look. Don’t you want a job so you can live on your own?” “Why not just stick up for me? Vouch for me!” “That’s not how the world works.”
Prikaži ovu nit -
“I just- look- ... I’m going for a walk.” “At 8 in the evening?! This is ridiculous, you should be getting ready for-” “I’ll be back in an hour.” “Chelsea!” SLAM
Prikaži ovu nit -
X started awake. “I’m okay!!! ... Except for my pride. That’s definitely broken.” Danica- X craned it’s neck to look over at the kitchen. A flipped chair, a hyena on her back, and white powder- flour? No, pancake mix- all over the rec room kitchen. It shut it’s eyes and groaned.
Prikaži ovu nit -
Wait where was- “Adi’s Mistress called hir in for an early morning... Something. Shi made me get up and help hir get hir limbs on, since ‘I got more sleep’. Can’t believe shi went and got you a blanket and pillow! Shi totally favors you~” ribbed the ‘yeen.
Prikaži ovu nit
Kraj razgovora
Novi razgovor -
Čini se da učitavanje traje već neko vrijeme.
Twitter je možda preopterećen ili ima kratkotrajnih poteškoća u radu. Pokušajte ponovno ili potražite dodatne informacije u odjeljku Status Twittera.
, av by