Me: Why do I feel a constant, low-grade panic? It’s like my blood is carbonated.
Also me: Yum yum let’s turn on twitter and see who’s yellin
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Ariel Dumas
@ArielDumas
IG: @ arieldumaspubicaccount - Head Writer and Supervising Producer for
Ariel Dumas’s Tweets
"I find your explanation reductive and actually insulting, including to black Americans" said Vivek Ramaswamy to a black man. Don Lemon was in the right here to challenge him.
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according to the NYT this interview that Don Lemon conducted last week with Vivek Ramaswamy played a role in his firing. Note co-host Poppy Harlow sitting silently while Lemon goes after Vivek.
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"I'm not a candidate, so we'll see if and when that changes," Gov. DeSantis, who is in Japan right now, says when asked about polls that show him falling behind Trump.
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This is a muppet and you cannot tell me otherwise.
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"I'm not a candidate, so we'll see if and when that changes," Gov. DeSantis, who is in Japan right now, says when asked about polls that show him falling behind Trump.
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Happy birthday to John Waters, who, when directing me in a film, uttered these immortal words: Everyone in this scene give me more. NOT JACKIE
#ADirtyShame
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Interesting choice by -- my favorite news show btw-- to do an entire segment in book bans that didn't feature one POC, that didn't mention the racial makeup of Moms of Liberty, and that erased the role the targeting of 1619 Project has played in all of this.
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all episodes of jury duty are out now on amazon freevee ~ thank you for watching!!!
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Sir we do not give a shit what you think about the abortion pill people have been taking very safely for over two decades, it has absolutely nothing to do with you, you are not a scientist or doctor or pharmacologist or even a person with a uterus, please get another hobby
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You can tell Twitter Blue is a good product because the only two ways to get it is to pay for it or make the owner of Twitter so mad he buys it for you to punish you
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12yo: I’ve been thinking about something. So, Wario and Waluigi are the opposite of Mario and Luigi in every way. Therefore since Mario and Luigi’s jobs are to unclog toilets, Wario and Waluigi’s jobs must be to clog toilets
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i asked A.I. to write an I Think You Should Leave sketch
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Flight attendants delayed a Southwest flight for an hour after someone spilled rice in the aisle and no one would confess to it
"She went up and down the aisle and asked each passenger one by one, loudly, who spilled the rice” khou.com/article/news/n
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wait I’m crying they’re giving them for punishment now !!?!!
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never not thinking about how rose byrne is a god tier comedic actress
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Karl Delossantos
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Ah, yeah... looks like people who were verified still are verified. He literally just hid it.
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The cast recording is FINALLY out. Beautiful, poignant, funny and driving original songs from and . Plus a favorite or two from the original film and a little #LedZeppelin, , to boot!
almostfamous.lnk.to/broadway
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I spend 100 days a year in Europe, but Day 101 — the day I return to my hometown of Edmonds, WA — is always my happiest. I can see my old junior high from my office window — and my neighborhood pub fills the space that once held “Steves Sound of Music,” my dad’s piano store.
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So sad, he can make a car that blows up and a rocket that blows up but still can't write a tweet that blows up.
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Twitter updated its TOS today
Don’t know if this is new verbiage, but for all you folks against #AI—you’re gonna want to leave Twitter ASAP.
TL;DR: X Corp can use ANYTHING YOU POST for whatever purpose they want and for any current or future tech.
read image description
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My daughter told me she has a plan for Spring as the cat-callers come out:
She's making a small sign to pull out of her pocket when men say things to her. It says, "Fuck you, I'm 12."
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It was kind of a wild choice off the McDonald’s standard menu but it really really paid off.
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I just love this by - the menu-ordering part reminds me of how as a kid, my #1 fast food joy was the McDonalds Fajita Wrap. My gosh, it was so good. The squishy, savory, salt of it, with a sweet-spicy salt. EACH ORDER CAME WITH TWO!!!
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how'd this go
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On April 1st, we will begin winding down our legacy verified program and removing legacy verified checkmarks. To keep your blue checkmark on Twitter, individuals can sign up for Twitter Blue here: twitter.com/i/twitter_blue
Organizations can sign up for twitter.com/i/en/verifiedo… Show more
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I AM FOURTEEN. MY FRIEND ALICIA DROVE US HALF AN HOUR OUT OF THE SUBURBS SO WE COULD STAND AROUND SMOKING CLOVES AND BUY WOOLEN MILITARY SURPLUS SHIRTS AT RAGSTOCK. IT IS A SCHOOL NIGHT.
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Automated
Calhoun Square
Date: 1990s
Address: 3001 Hennepin Ave.
Source: Hennepin County Library
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The Missouri AG wants you to help them find trans kids.
It would be a huge shame if people flooded this Missouri “transgender concern” form with bullshit! A huge shame.
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So… pitch. WGA should sell merch (like this) and use monies generated for strike fund to help our most vulnerable members. I’d totally rock that hat.
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NegCom and @WGAWest Board member @travisdonnelly with a new statement hat 
#WGAStrong
#WGAStrong
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So… pitch. WGA should sell merch (like this) and use monies generated for strike fund to help our most vulnerable members. I’d totally rock that hat. twitter.com/lisacullen/sta…
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Way More WGA Members Want to Strike Now Than Did in 2007 bit.ly/41jbSRa
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BREAKING: TV & movie writers just voted to authorize a strike that could shut down Hollywood.
Writers are making less than they were 10 years ago, while corporate profits have skyrocketed.
They're not standing for it.
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WGA members have authorized a strike by 97.85%. Writers are ready for a deal from the studios that allows writers to share in the success of the content they create and build a stable life. #WGAStrong
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it's a tough decision, but this won out because star wars bros are still messaging me in a rage about it over a year later
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what was your biggest twitter controversy?
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GIF
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What is the best shot in any batman film?
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Introducing SNL’s first non-binary cast member, it's @MEATBRICKMOLLY!
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Has anyone involved with James Bond met men in their 30s recently? This Bond will be playing Elden Ring. He will have his keys on a lanyard. This Bond will be drinking an IPA.
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One week later. I like having it in my feed, so retweeting again. THIS is the question to ask. I would follow up with 'Stop telling writers they are greedy when they are asking for 2% of the profit pie and start asking studios why they think that is unreasonable.' #WGAStrong
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Stop asking writers if they’re going to strike and start asking studios why they won’t pay writers what they’re worth.
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ANNOUNCEMENT: it would probably be fun to eat a meal out of a muffin tin 🤷♂️
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