David SimonVerified account

@AoDespair

Author, journalist, and TV writer/producer. Angriest Man in Television is faint praise indeed.

Baltimore, MD
davidsimon.com
Joined August 2012
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  1. 5 hours ago

    I blocked the mutt. Will someone please dig that fella out of my discards and shove this little news item down his piehole? Thanks much.

    so much for guy who thought you were overreacting to loose barges.
    3 replies 8 retweets 69 likes
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  2. 5 hours ago

    Look! A squirrel!

    Where is Hunter’s laptop? We really should know what he used the WH for in covering up crimes committed. We know it wasn’t Russian disinformation. Why did he lie? His dealings with China, Russia, Ukraine, and Mexico. Before the sham of sells
    9 replies 12 retweets 280 likes
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  3. 5 hours ago

    Still.

    Times are not good here. The city is crumbling into ashes. It has been buried under taxes and frauds and maladministrations so that it has become a study for archaeologists. But it is better to live here in sackcloth and ashes than to own the whole state of Ohio. Lafcadio Hearn.
    Show this thread
    3 retweets 35 likes
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  4. Retweeted
    6 hours ago

    , MD: 11y/o Na’Siyah McPhaul was last seen on Sunday, August 29, in the 4900 block of Pembridge Avenue. McPhaul is approximately 5 feet, 5 inches tall and weighs about 145 pounds.
    1 reply 18 retweets 18 likes
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  5. 6 hours ago

    There’s no evacuating you, Ted. Not without leaving the immediate environs as an EPA Superfund site.

    Joe Biden broke his promise to evacuate all Americans from Afghanistan.
    16 replies 16 retweets 226 likes
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  6. 7 hours ago

    In which a Republican lawmaker obstructs justice in the most public way humanly possible. Yo, Kev, is you issuing public press statements on a criminal conspiracy?

    My statement on Democrats asking companies to violate federal law:
    22 replies 80 retweets 538 likes
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  7. 7 hours ago

    “I agree with Ann Coulter” has for more than a decade been my designated signal that I am being held at gunpoint and to immediately alert law enforcement. I shall now replace that with “Matt Gaetz can date my teenage daughter.”

    Trump REPEATEDLY demanded that we bring our soldiers home, but only President Biden had the balls to do it. Here are a few of Trump's wuss, B.S. - I mean "masterful" - tweets:
    92 replies 513 retweets 4,065 likes
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  8. 8 hours ago

    Shorter: I’m guilty. Others in my party, too. Stop looking for evidence. Right now. Stop it.

    New: House GOP Leader Kevin McCarthy threatens telecom companies to not comply with Jan. 6 committee request for phone records, claiming it would violate federal law — “A Republican majority will not forget.”
    33 replies 471 retweets 1,711 likes
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  9. 9 hours ago

    I feel your rage. Just spitballing, but until you get the government you want and not the one for which too many other people voted, you should maybe think about storming the Capitol and beating on some police.

    1:22
    GOP Rep. Lauren Boebert calling to: - Impeach Biden, Harris (for not trying to oust Biden) & Blinken - Remove Pelosi Says Republicans with “doubts” will face primary challenges: “No amount of your precious money will be able to save you from the uprising of the American people.”
    Show this thread
    6 replies 9 retweets 126 likes
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  10. 17 hours ago

    There is nothing — nothing at all — remaining in the pantheon of human mendacity that can get you expelled from the U.S. Congress. Fuck a dead girl or traffic in live boys, slander anyone you desire or negate democracy itself and promise violence. Nothing matters.

    At a county GOP event, Rep. Madison Cawthorn lied that it's a lie Biden was "dutifully elected," said we know the election was "stolen"…then warned of "bloodshed," and suggested he might regretfully have to take up arms, if election systems "continue to be rigged" (they aren't):
    Show this thread
    23 replies 128 retweets 702 likes
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  11. 18 hours ago

    “I’m from the government snd I’m here to help,” sneered Ronald Reagan. But the harder truth is that only as a collective can a society accomplish great things for the commonweal. And the solution for bad governance is not less of it, but better governance.

    The levees and floodwalls that protect New Orleans held up against Hurricane Ida's fury, officials say. It was the toughest test since the federal government spent billions to upgrade a system that catastrophically failed during Katrina 16 years ago.
    34 replies 341 retweets 1,695 likes
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  12. Aug 30

    I live off Prytania. Presently, I have a fallen tree pressing against my house. And I want the maritime traffic minimized in favor of securing New Orleans and its inhabitants. Now fuck right off, Daniel. You fucking scrote.

    Replying to @AoDespair
    The Monday morning quarterbacking comments from some non-local is not only patronizing but not helpful. Especially within 24 hours of the crisis. But carpetbaggers gonna carpetbag.
    7 replies 15 retweets 337 likes
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  13. Aug 30

    Longitude is a confounding notion for flat-earth mooks.

    Left Afghanistan a day early. How many left behind in that lost 24hrs?
    18 replies 64 retweets 636 likes
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  14. Aug 30

    When they finally bury Newt Gingrich, they’re going to have to screw him into the ground. He’s that malformed and twisted.

    Harris visited the same site Trump's ambassador to Vietnam, a US military rep from the embassy, and lots of American and Vietnamese people visited to pay tribute to McCain upon his death. McCain himself visited the site more than once as a senator.
    Show this thread
    17 replies 49 retweets 413 likes
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  15. Aug 30

    And make sure their shirts are brown. There is absolutely no bottom to what remains of the Republican party. None.

    1:20
    PA GOP Gov candidate Steve Lynch today: “Forget going into these school boards with freaking data. You go in to these school boards to remove them. I’m going in with 20 strong men and I’m gonna give them an option - they can leave or they can be removed.”
    Show this thread
    44 replies 110 retweets 888 likes
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  16. Aug 30

    A passover parable from Yaron Orbach, a member of my tribe and the director of photography on this dry film set in Maryland: “How is your place in New Orleans?” “I don’t know yet. Friends are headed there to see.” “Did you paint a Star of David on the roof?” “I did not” “Uh oh.”

    9 replies 4 retweets 161 likes
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  17. Aug 30

    All of them looking for an Industrial Canal retaining wall but willing to settle for whatever target of opportunity they can find. How many more times is Louisiana gonna fuck this one simple thing up?

    DEVELOPING. St. Bernard officials confirm 22 barges got loose on the Mississippi River and are now drifting in the river. They are concerned about the parish water intake system and the oil refineries.
    12 replies 13 retweets 122 likes
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  18. Retweeted
    Aug 29

    Making my 1st film, Roger & Me, I was broke so I wrote to some famous people to ask for help. Only one responded: Ed Asner. “I don’t know you, kid, but here’s 500 bucks” said the note attached to the check. “Sounds like it’ll be a great film. I was an autoworker once.” R.I.P. Ed

    571 replies 7,290 retweets 79,691 likes
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  19. Aug 30

    As I continue to note, a man takes a few playful photos of himself at a Beaufort, S.C. motel in a Frederick’s of Hollywood corset with one slightly underaged manatee on his arm and the goddam Russians never let him forget.

    Is there anyone more of a turncoat than , more of a disgrace , as a friend, more of a pathetic excuse for a man? Lindsey Graham repeats impeachment call for former friend Joe Biden
    17 replies 41 retweets 330 likes
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  20. Aug 30

    Can’t fucking imagine. Probably just random happenstance.

    1:15
    Glenn Greenwald: I would be on [Fox News] every day if I didn’t say no sometimes. I just got done taping a Fox show, I’ll probably do another one on Monday. Why is that happening? It’s bizarre... And now I’m the most frequent guest on Tucker Carlson’s show. How did that happen?
    Show this thread
    26 replies 37 retweets 626 likes
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