Alki

@Alki_holic

inspiration for great works of art.

Joined November 2011
9 Photos and videos Photos and videos

Tweets

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  1. 17 Nov 2014

    <<<<<<< when you knock out the bae in an elevator and she hit all the floor buttons as she drops

    Undo
  2. 26 Sep 2014

    Mike Moss from is Perv from Parks and Rec

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  3. 11 Sep 2014

    The hottie and the illuminotty

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  4. 20 Aug 2014

    I'm just a simple man who still gets hype off the "Hey" chant in every other song

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  5. 24 Jul 2014

    I got pulled over for speeding and the officer gave me a brochure about joining the police force. Thanks for being white, mom and dad!

    1 retweet
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  6. Retweeted
    1 Jul 2014

    Me and hot take on the supreme court decision:

    1 retweet 1 like
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  7. 6 Jun 2014

    A beach but instead of sand, Dorito flavor dust.

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  8. 25 May 2014

    Hubris is attempting to pee in the dark

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  9. 7 May 2014

    "NO don't look through my phone!" Me: "Why? got something to hi..." My hands tremble, the phone drops to the ground, the app loads

    1 retweet
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  10. 7 May 2014

    Memes are a prepackaged DIY joke kit

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  11. Retweeted
    3 May 2014

    I wanna give a shoutout to all the fat bitches riding dick with T-shirts on.

    12 retweets 30 likes
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  12. 26 Apr 2014

    Growing up is losing the violent, all-consuming urge to finish every beer you, (or someone else...) opens.

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  13. 16 Apr 2014

    kurt cobain fugazi Ignorance ur birthday Cuba

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  14. Retweeted
    9 Apr 2014

    "Respect my Olympic bling, my legs don't work but my chopper still sing"- Oscar Pistorius

    2 replies 1 retweet 2 likes
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  15. 9 Apr 2014
    Replying to

    "More legs than remorse in me, Oscar Pistolas, can't outrun this machinery, leave u stankin in the restroom, light a candle b"

    Undo

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