I don't see the problem as gender normativity in the abstract but as specific gender norms being misapplied. There are hypothetical forms of gender normativity that don't hurt people like me, maybe not anyone
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It helps the coherence of speech and thought to be able to reason abstractly, in categories
More aggressively, there are porous but real categories that precede definition. Gender is not reified out of social opinion any more than race is. And people are hurt by error in reasoning, not by reasoning
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It would have been very good for me to have had a social norm about chemically transitioning young, or about socially funding surgery. But because these things are unwanted by a fraction of a fraction of "trans" people I am harmed by the absence of these norms.
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