I wish sex were just a woman going to her front porch and howling BALOOOGA and men converge and battle it out with lawn ornaments.
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it could work like that. But you'd have to show up naked and shout. Winner gets to fuck me
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this makes me wonder if you've tried this...
The answer scares me
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this works if you go out to the forest and are in estrus... because you know... lonely lumberjacks and hippies and ish.
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I would show up with my own loincloth, spears, and baby oil, ready to battle Spartacus style! Or... Gnomacus style, if you will
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Little ceramic cows in neighbors' garden. Mental image of gnomes gone cow-tipping in the night. Falsetto "Mooooo! (thump)."
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The savvy slip in the back door with champagne & chocolate covered strawberries in 1 hand, & leather things in the other.
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we don't have horns or tusks. we human males are shite fighters, even for mating
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And why do I have the feeling this will actually happen some day?