Wait, is submission in kink about outsourcing desire bc ur not sure you can want / lust / desire and it's allowed / will be met w/o u needing to be good or bad? Asking for a friend.
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my guess is that much (but not all) of the time it's deeply ingrained on a genetic or inherent level and most of our stories about it are rationalizations after the fact
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doesn't seem to be significantly correlated with any childhood experiences i asked about in my data