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if you accept yourself hard enough, it'll upset the people who haven't accepted the parts of themselves that they see in you
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Fully agree. More importantly though is how you respond to that reaction. Do you sympathize/relate or distance/retaliate? I found I started with the latter and matured to the former.
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I both agree and disagree! I find that acceptance is often transmissible, helping others relax and accept those parts just because they can feel your acceptance/love. If the timing is right of course.