Conversation

Aella
@Aella_Girl
I don't find the divide of sexual interests as 'fetishes' vs 'kinks' vs 'paraphilias' to be useful or interesting . It's maybe the worst concept to come out of sex research. IMO if it's arousing to ppl, it's a sexual interest, from necrophilia to the missionary position.
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Aella
@Aella_Girl
Some sexual interests are culturally normal and common, others aren't, but there's no cutoff! It' a spectrum, and cultures change. Some sexual interests are obligate! This is fine, I just call it "an obligate sexual interest."
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Aella
@Aella_Girl
If we're gonna draw a line around a subgroup of sexual interests to try to give it a name that designates them as weird, I want it to be data-based. "Sexual interests with prevalence of 5% or lower are called kinks"? then I'll accept it, sure.
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Aella
@Aella_Girl
'paraphilia' is maybe the most defensible, since ppl sometimes use it to mean 'sexual interest so severe/extreme it's damaging or dangerous', but i don't trust culture's ability to determine this in practice, e.g. homosexuality counted as a paraphilia for a long time.
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Nick Arteaga
@Nick_Arteaga1
Replying to
@Aella_Girl
I agree but we also have to rely on culture and law to a degree. There’s a reason why certain things are taboo. Some violate rights of individuals who can’t consent, for example.
treyfgirl
@treyfgirl
Replying to
@Aella_Girl
paraphilia is a useful category, we just need to be better at determining what is/is not harmful. same as crime/sin more generally - just because we have been dumb about what we call crime in past (interracial marriage, weed) doesn't mean we have to throw it out
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puer aeternus
@PuerAeternus25
Replying to
@Aella_Girl
Sexual attraction towards non-consenting children/adults. Not weird personally, but if a culture has to have any moral standing or be regarded with any seriousness, it should actively discourage it/ban it/make it punishable. Kinks are not the same as Speech.
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