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two people are married and both agree that they don't want the other person to sit in any chairs outside the home. standing only. one day one of them gets tired at work, and they sit in a chair. Ashamed, they lie to their partner about it, pretend it never happened. 1/

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Is this bad? lying, a betrayal of their relationship? yeah definitely, but I don't really feel an emotional punch of horror here. idk, seems real unsurprising someone gave into tired legs at some point, the original agreement seemed super unrealistic to begin with. 2/

7:56 AM · Sep 20, 2022

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this sort of sums up the way I feel when I see cheating portrayed in media - I don't feel horror, just like, well of course, what did u expect with such an unrealistic agreement? This emotionally disconnects me from a whole lot of plotlines in media.

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I am not trying to argue here the chair analogy is actually the same thing as monogamy- chairs don't pose a pregnancy risk for example - I'm just trying to convey how mundane it strikes me. feels like I'm watching someone sit down in a chair and everyone gasps.

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"oh right, i forgot they weren't supposed to sit in the chair, I guess they promised not to do that for some reason. um, grrr. how terrible1!!1!" - my emotions

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re:replies, guys this thread is trying to convey my emotional reaction to seeing cheating depicted in media, if I were trying to convey the downsides of monogamy I would have picked a different analogy.

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Jay, god's weakest soldier (29-25)

@ForrestPoetJay

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That's a false equivalency since 1) there isn't any emotional bond over standing with a partner and 2) sitting in an office does provide comfort that isn't available home, cheating isn't that

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@ForrestPoetJay

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Cheating regularly provides comfort for people that isn't available at their home. That's one of the primary reasons it happens. Agreed about the emotional impact though.

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Non-monogamous people being almost completely unable to comprehend monogamy and/or the concept of cheating will never not be fascinating to me

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Pocket Circuit Stan

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to me, most of the time it’s because the partner has been eyeing someone’s chair for a while, usually someone they already know and they’re also sitting at home less often. it’s not as common that they’re going to a bar and sitting on a bar stool after a few drinks

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I think the entire structure of that relationship is bad.

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And that "unrealistic" is the difference between your analogy and the original.

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