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TMI escorting story once i was going to see an inattentive client who had a kinda big dick and liked to go in dry, so a few hours before the appt i put in this vaginal self-lubricating insert thing. It wasn't lube, just like, 'vaginal moisture,' I hoped it would help 1/

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(i could have brought and used lube, which I did sometimes, but this guy didn't pick up on subtle signals for me to like, break the energy to go grab the lube, so i figured i might as well experiment with this new thing) the moisture stuff does in fact work 2/

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but it results in ridiculous white froth, like it looks like i have the yeast infection to end all yeast infections. i keep trying to surreptitiously wipe away the excess but theres no way this guy doesnt see it. its like whipped cream all over our genitals 3/

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he politely doesn't say anything, and afterwards suggests we go shower. in my head im like. fuck. after spending a weirdly long amount of time in the shower, i casually manage to squeak out 'haha yeah so i tried this vaginal lubricant thing earlier' and awkwardly explained

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and he goes, "...you weren't cumming?" i was like, what he's like "that wasn't your cum?" at no point during my time with this man did i get even a little close to orgasm, nor did i pretend. i thought it was clear that i had not orgasmed, and id assumed he was fine with that

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like, some guys clearly put in some effort to make me orgasm, and that's nice, and then i either do or pretend to, but this guy *so clearly* seemed to not give a shit about my orgasm i didn't even bother to even pretend cause i thought it would have been beyond unrealistic

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and that's not even starting on the fact that no, natural lubrication does not turn white upon orgasm, and *especially* not this abnormal icing-esque substance oozing out of me like an idiot, i was like "that's... not how orgasms work"

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poor guy was crestfallen, and i realized id screwed up. I shouldn't have said anything, just let him think that the eldritch cottage cheese everywhere was in fact a sign of his prowess. but it was too late.

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I tried to reassure him he was in fact good, like tried to vaguely allude to him being effective without outright lying. He was sweet about it, but it was too late. Much as I predicted, he never booked me again. Moral of the story: being honest about sex doesn't pay the bills.

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(The guy himself was lovely, I did really like him as a person and he had many admirable traits, just he was still youngish and I guess hadn't had enough women be honest with him in bed yet)

11:00 PM · Sep 15, 2022

Replying to

As an ex-sex worker, I felt every moment of this story 😂 I had one client for whom I would keep a small bottle of lotion handy. I’d leave a few dollops on the sheets while he was distracted. Good guy but *very* insecure, so him thinking I c*me handsfree made his whole week

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@theoldcavalier

Replying to

That's kind of sad that he was hurt and didn't book again, and I get that being honest about sex doesn't pay the bills, as you say. But a possible good outcome (of course you have no way of knowing) is that maybe it ended up being part of his learning. Mistakes and embarrassment

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LeonardJamesAkaar

Replying to

Wait, that's artificial tears for vaginas? Thank g-d, my girlfriends would tell me it was rabies.

Replying to

You probably did the guy a favour. If he felt that bad, he may have chosen to educate himself.

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And now I wonder if my therapist does the same thing. It's good you told him b/c it was good thing to learn, but it "doesn't pay the bills" since it caused him to quit.

@pandabluelight

Replying to

Unfortunately, there are many paradoxes that culture forces into masculinity. There's an impression that well endowed means autopilot satisfaction. Couple that to the negative perception of a guy not being able to satisfy their partner, and it's a recipe for injured pride.

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Don't lie, or at least for an extended period. My gf told me after a year of dating and fucking that she genuinely hated having sex with me. She initiated sex with me most of the time. Ruined my confidence and trust in what she says to me. I still don't fully trust her.

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Replying to

Good story...but "going in dry" seems the equivalent of a "toothy throat tap" in "No... no... we're not having any of that today dear." Male equivalent of a Pretty Pretty Pony? These are OMFG hot women who are just crap in bed. Caused by no one wanting to upset the pretty pony.

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