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(i could have brought and used lube, which I did sometimes, but this guy didn't pick up on subtle signals for me to like, break the energy to go grab the lube, so i figured i might as well experiment with this new thing) the moisture stuff does in fact work 2/

but it results in ridiculous white froth, like it looks like i have the yeast infection to end all yeast infections. i keep trying to surreptitiously wipe away the excess but theres no way this guy doesnt see it. its like whipped cream all over our genitals 3/

he politely doesn't say anything, and afterwards suggests we go shower. in my head im like. fuck. after spending a weirdly long amount of time in the shower, i casually manage to squeak out 'haha yeah so i tried this vaginal lubricant thing earlier' and awkwardly explained

and he goes, "...you weren't cumming?" i was like, what he's like "that wasn't your cum?" at no point during my time with this man did i get even a little close to orgasm, nor did i pretend. i thought it was clear that i had not orgasmed, and id assumed he was fine with that

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like, some guys clearly put in some effort to make me orgasm, and that's nice, and then i either do or pretend to, but this guy *so clearly* seemed to not give a shit about my orgasm i didn't even bother to even pretend cause i thought it would have been beyond unrealistic

and that's not even starting on the fact that no, natural lubrication does not turn white upon orgasm, and *especially* not this abnormal icing-esque substance oozing out of me like an idiot, i was like "that's... not how orgasms work"

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poor guy was crestfallen, and i realized id screwed up. I shouldn't have said anything, just let him think that the eldritch cottage cheese everywhere was in fact a sign of his prowess. but it was too late.

11:00 PM · Sep 15, 2022

Replying to

I tried to reassure him he was in fact good, like tried to vaguely allude to him being effective without outright lying. He was sweet about it, but it was too late. Much as I predicted, he never booked me again. Moral of the story: being honest about sex doesn't pay the bills.

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