Conversation

Aella
@Aella_Girl
I once had a male friend grab me at a party and start kissing me, no warning. I was like uhh no ty. he explained that he'd heard me talk about wanting guys to take bold initiative and decided to try it. It wasn't super comfortable for me, but I found it sweet of him to try.
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Aella
@Aella_Girl
Replying to
@Aella_Girl
Also a lot of this hinges on how well the dude can take rejection. My friend in question reacted very well and is still my friend today; the attempt didn't damage anything. I would NOT want aggro dudes to try things if my rejection would fuck up our friendship.
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Aella
@Aella_Girl
I'd love more experimental social frames that give ppl more room to explore here. I'd love a party where aggro sexual moves are considered default okay, and you consent to having aggro moves made at you by entering, for example.
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Aella
@Aella_Girl
I'd also like more explicit individual norms, or something? Like I wish ppl could turn visible setting preferences to "I want more aggro, my soul is a single callous" or "do not be even a lil aggro at me or i will ptsd at you"
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Aella
@Aella_Girl
I can think of a few male friends where if they just pulled me into a closet and started aggro banging me I'd be like well ok I guess. these are ppl I'd probably turn down for dates and (to most) have made absolutely zero indication of interest to.
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Christopher Michaels
@deeptantra
Replying to
@Aella_Girl
Onto other intimate play that is a staged aggro testing gently for consent as you go in a way that is a non-verbal negotiation without uncertainty but with sensitivity. Does this sound like a workable process? Btw I'm half a world a way so you are safe from a chance encounter
Nick
@nickcammarata
Replying to
@Aella_Girl
wow, I think this is the only take I've heard other than a "there must be no false positives" (which is assumed to be not possible in virtually every other setting of science/life)
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