Sometimes you can have unreasonable feelings, in the sense that you don't "condone" them, but they exist anyway. For example, "I'm mad people don't want to fuck me" - obvs you might not actually believe people *should* fuck you, but the emotion's still there
Anyway, one of mine:
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Some "unreasonable" part of me is angry that I've gotten many many times more resources (money, gifts) from men who just wanted to fuck me, compared to men who loved me.
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I'm fully aware this doesn't make "sense" - I have been clearly optimizing for men giving me money through resources and have historically tended to date men much less financially secure than me, so I know it's not actually anyone else's fault.
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But knowing what is reasonable to feel usually doesn't change what you actually feel, and for a long time I would suppress and ignore what I actually felt - without even realizing I was suppressing it - if it seemed an "unreasonable" feeling.
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But i def got a trad side that wants to be financially supported by a boy who loves me. maybe this trad side evolved out of dating too many homeless boys? at this point im like fuck it, im not dating a single additional homeless boy no matter how charming he is
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I wonder if these feelings always fall under the umbrella of “resentment”?
When I think of my own examples of this, that’s where the feeling sits.
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I find those feelings the hardest to reconcile with myself, since I very much like to logically understand myself. Many feelings, even if not too logical can be attributed to an innate inner desire, but these are so much contradicting my concious self that it just bothers me.
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My unreasonable feeling is that there should be someone whose taste in music correlates highly to mine, as if it could prove my taste in music is objectively correct.
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My insight fwiiw. It is not the initial emotion that gets you: The resentment or rejection, but the secondary emotions that present as ego judgements and defense mechanisms. I try to stay with the deepest hurt, so it doesn't ramify. But it doesn't always work.
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There are no unreasonable emotions. There are only unreasonable perceptions and ideas. Emotion is only output. Change the perception to change the emotion.
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