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Sometimes I forget you have open DMs. That must be total chaos. Do you mass delete them, do you even attempt to sort through them for any chance of something actually useful in there, or perhaps a combination of both.
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Regarding your thread. Having no communication with the guy didn't work, but maybe try other types of communication limitation. "I only want to talk using google translate in a mutually unknown language." "tell me who you are using drawings only" "memes only, no speak"
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Could the opposite of not talking about the sex work? Find a mutually attracted guy with whom your relationship status to each other is mutually accepted and then talk about sex a lot. Everything you like and he likes is all laid out on table. Build up tension and then explode.