It really depends on the woman. It can be all 3. Generally, I think the guy should be a bit taller. If the woman is skinny and feminine then her being taller can be very hot.
I am 168cm (5'6.5),which is ok in my country and I generally don't mind height in women, I have dated a few girls a few inches taller than me. For some reason I really like when they're like a tiny bit taller. Like 2cm or so, idk why.
Now ask whether they'd approach a taller woman, and whether a height difference makes them feel insecure. Because I'm not even that tall, but I've had quite enough annoying experiences.