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From the outside, they often look the same - how do you tell apart a person saying a word for terribleness, and a good person rejecting the frame entirely? If you buy into the idea that words can be inherently terrible, then it's hard to conceive of good people using them at all.
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Ask people why they said the bad word, no matter if their a terrible or good person, then if they give a good reason their a good person. But I find the framing bizarre, don’t think a person is doing good by saying a word that isn’t aloud to be said.
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Aside from specifically constructed hypothetical scenarios, there is usually nothing to be gained by normalizing usage of such words, so it is difficult to perceive the "good people" here as doing anything ethically productive.
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Assuming that framing is true, the most rational inference from a listener is almost always going to be that the speaker is the first type of person. Not least because if we assume that the word causes distress to a specific subset of listeners you sort of have to assume intent
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