it turns out telling people "you're doing that as a defense mechanism" is not the best way to get them to put down said defense mechanism... even if you're right😵💫
it turns out making confident declarations about anyone's state (regardless of how right you may be) almost always—
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just makes them upset. this can be really confusing especially when talking to people who claim to be "all about the truth", "totally real" or even "totally logical". they still get mad when you read them. unless of course you notice something that puts them in a "good" light.—
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I rarely have anyone make a confident declaration about my state without trying ton"gotcha" me; the motive isn't empathetic. I've found empathetic people usually don't assume they know me, they always ask and are looking to be surprised.