Often when people talk about fetishes, I mentally replace 'fetish' with 'sexual orientation.'
Not cause orientation is a fetish really, but cause the contrast makes it very clear how much we trivialize and judge fetishes.
For example:
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"Life is too rich to just be stuck on being straight"
"Something's wrong with you if you can't get off to straight porn"
"If you unravel your trauma, you'll stop being gay"
This sounds absurd to us, cause we recognize orientation as an immutable, fine part of self.
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But a lot of fetishes are like this too! Some experience them in the exact same way as orientation. I often hear stuff like
"I always remember being into x, even as a child"
"Sexual stuff without x just doesn't arouse me"
"When I did x I finally felt like a normal sexual being"
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Replying to
hmm i’m curious if there are some fetishes more than others that seem to be obligate for some people
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