Conversation

I wanna get better at not just spurting out my thoughts with fun as the primary objective, and instead figure out how to tweet controversial takes *without* getting ratio'd. Any tips for methods of presenting tough ideas that don't make people mad at you?

143

293

Replying to

What's the goal here? What are you trying to *do* with "talk about controversial stuff without people being mad"?

Replying to

and

I expect the strategy is different between cases like "we need to work on this problem constructively and I don't want people's anger getting in the way" vs. "I like talking about controversial issues for fun but it's stressful to be insulted by angry people"

Replying to

This seems true, I think I don't clearly want one-and-not-the-other of these. I think I naturally blurt out 'fun' phrases, and have this orientation (of 'find the fun') in everything, but also sometimes do this while wanting to talk about the problem constructively

Replying to

and

my desire to 'actually talk about the problem constructively' i think persists always, like im trying to imagine a scenario where someone puts in a good faith disagreement with a tweet and i don't think i'd ever find this unwelcome. I do find some of myself is unclear to me here

Replying to

what is the thing that has started seeming bad to you about "blurt things out, let people get mad"?

Aella

@Aella_Girl

Replying to

@s_r_constantin

Uh i'm afraid of people viewing me as a malicious edgelord? there's some 'slur' feeling in there i wanna avoid. i'm afraid of people i care about, or people who have impacts in my life, viewing me this way. It feels really sad to me, like i'd feel super misunderstood.

8:40 PM · Jan 24, 2022

Replying to

and

as in this *has* happened irl, ive blurted out fun-controversy in a way i felt comfortable with and assumed was taken well, and found out later that this made some people very mad and they were going around saying bad things about me to people who know me

Show replies

Replying to

oh. some people surely already do see you that way! and anybody who's already choosing to be part of your life knows you make edgy polls! so this mostly reduces to "I might want to connect in future with people who would disapprove of my current edginess level", right?

Replying to

uhhh i think this is true, yes. theres some 'grey area' here, like i don't think i want to connect with people who clearly disapprove with my current edgy level, but i feel sensitive about people who 'aren't sure' or ''might misunderstand' i think