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I'd allow myself to get stabbed in a nonvital location in the body in exchange for an expert book on how to navigate tricky community situations like one person asking you to disinvite someone else or how to make decisions around community exclusion based on grey area evidence

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easy peasy, let the person whos asking you to uninvite someone know that the person they want to uninvite will be at the event but they can take it upon themselves not to come

Aella

@Aella_Girl

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@Bognost

ok but what if the person who's asking me to uninvite alleges medium bad behavior and me *not* uninviting the person might reflect poorly on me in the future if it turns out the allegations are true

2:37 AM · Nov 15, 2021

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and

They’re asking you to assume the role of arbiter on a values infringement, and not realizing the position that it puts you in. Groups that span disparate values systems must agree on a justice system; otherwise the group leader(s) easily fall into trap of being cast as autocrats

Replying to

and

Depending on how much time you have to figure this out, you need to get the members of the group to agree to a (hopefully simple) set of rules around this sort of thing. BTW this is one of the reasons open source communities have code of conduct and explicit adjudication systems.

Replying to

and

If we operate on hearsay and negatively impact others 🤷‍♂️ it’s pretty crappy. Unless you’ve got proof, all you have is unsubstantiated rumor.

Replying to

and

I assume it's a community event you own, like a "rationalist meetup", and you don't know either person very well. In that case I'd explain to the requestor that you feel uncomfortable uninviting someone, but you absolutely want to make sure everyone is safe at the event.

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