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If you're in a community with a dude that acts real sus towards women, the only options are a) kick him out or b) keep it hush. This sets up a bad binary; what if the dude isn't *quite* sus enough to justify the extremeness of kicking? What if he provides huge value elsewhere? 1/
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If a dude doesn't manage to be egregious enough, have a weak enough social network, or provides too much value, it's hard to trigger the KICK HIM OUT, which leaves us with b) KEEP IT HUSH. I sorta want an option c) LET HIM STAY BUT ALSO BE PUBLIC ABOUT THE SUS BEHAVIOR
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A version of c kinda exists with whisper networks, when you join a community and someone takes you aside at a party after they see you talking to Joe and goes 'haha yeah he's nice but be careful with him, Bethany reported he xyz'd her last year'
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But this doesn't really work with public communities, like corporations or political movements. If you got a dude being sus towards women, you can't announce loudly "This dude is sus, but not enough to trigger kicking out, and he provides lots of value so he's staying'
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No, you either have to take the extreme option or keep it totally hush, and then when finally it ends up blowing up people are like why were you suppressing this, but the answer is 'cause the only other option felt more extreme than warranted'
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100%. Same applies to domestic abusers. If there were an option between implicit acceptance and complete moral condemnation, 1) perpetrators of abuse might be able to face themselves, and 2) their community might be able to influence behavior change.
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The Patrick Brown scandal in Canadian politics was like this Everyone in the Ontario PCs had heard something, but always second hand, and a whisper campaign existed but just not enough to permeate public consciousness When accusations DID come out, everyone turned on him
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There should be a social institution for that. Some kind of a ritual where this can be openly vented, without triggering a massive fallout. Romans had the Saturnalia to turn society on its head... Maybe everyone should write up their misgivings for Halloween or something?
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