i mean, okay, but i don't know what *that* means. What are you defining as 'girl'?
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It doesn't really have an exact definition. "Boy" and "girl" are arbitrary categories society puts people in. It's up to the person themselves to determine if they fit one or not.
I'm just saying that you can fit one and still not like gendered assumptions/stereotypes etc.
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I'm trying to clarify here, pls let me know if I'm wrong
you're saying that "girl" is a category determined by society (with stereotypes, like mops floors, etc.?) and people who do fit this category are girls, and people who don't, aren't girls?
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Well I think "mops floors" is more of a gender role (which are bullshit of course), but yeah that's the basic idea - things that are considered characteristics of a girl.
Since people are complex and generally don't neatly fit each other's assumptions, (cont.)
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it's up to each person to decide which gender, whether binary or not, makes the most sense to them. But even if it is binary, that doesn't mean all the assumptions people make are fair or right. At least that's how I see it
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I don't understand this. If "girl" is the category of "girl", which has a list of feminine stereotypes, then this means that I am personally only partially girl, and partially boy (for the stereotypes of boy that I hit). We could even make tests to help estimate your % gender
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I don't think it can be that clearly defined, for one thing, especially since it has so much to do with how people think and feel, which is hard to quantify like that. If someone thinks they fit a gender enough and are comfortable with it, then they know best
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But... I mean they probably don't know best? A lot of times people self-describe and self-understand poorly. If someone acts as the epitome of male stereotype in every way, yet says they're a girl, according to your definition I'd say they're mistaken.
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I wouldn't. It's true that people can describe and understand themselves poorly, but they're a lot better at it than an outside person coming in and making assumptions, because we all only have experience with our own minds. (cont.)
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And this applies to more than just gender. If someone tells you they think or feel a certain way, it wouldn't make sense to tell them they actually don't with any level of confidence, outside of some very specific circumstances, right? It's the same with this
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To some extent yes, but there's *lots* of other examples where we are happy to push back when we perceive people's self description to be wrong - on morality, on attractiveness, on height, on abusiveness, and yes, on personality
For example, I wasn't aware of my drive for debate/intellectual conflict as a defining trait for years, and other people told me they saw me as debate-prone. This countered my self perception, but was accurate.
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I've had people tell me I was being self righteous when I was and didn't want to admit it to myself, or a myriad of other stuff. I speak from experience when I say there have been cases where I was *incentivized* to be dishonest with myself.
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Those have more to do with actions or physical attributes though, except personality. And even in that case, if you think someone has a certain personality and it turns out they were just hiding it or communicating it in a way you didn't understand, they'd be right
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but doesn't a huge amount of the set of gender stereotypes have to do with physical attributes