but at this party I was a little drunk, and people were being adventurous, and my friend slid up to me and was like 'do u want to eat this strip of paper' and I was like... okay you know what? YOLO. YO-goddamn-LO. I ate the paper and then sat waiting, kind of autistically. 2/
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I kept scratching the side of my left wrist, hoping the pain would orient me. It didn't help. I sat there for a long time, staring at the cold water, taking layers of skin, and desperately trying to think myself sober. It was like running the wrong way on an escalator.
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After the intensity of it all faded a little bit, I vaguely realized I was very cold, and in a stroke of incredible luck I managed to find my way back. They'd all been looking for me; this time when I told them I needed to be alone, they set me up in a bedroom with a cat.
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I stared at the cat for a long time as I came down. I texted my partner at the time, "this is exceedingly uncomfortable". I slowly returned to myself, and eventually was pieced back together enough to join the sunrise leftovers of the party.
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We went to a 24hr diner at around 6 am, coated in sweat and bad makeup. I'd been shaken up really badly, but *something* in me was... new, and I was fascinated. Before we finally went to bed, I asked my friend where I could get more LSD, and that was the beginning of all of it.
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