Monogamy-by-default sounds like college-by-default. I'm like hey, isn't it weird you enter this life plan that is meant to help but also you're now in a lot of debt... Aren't there actual serious downsides we're sort of pretending are normal? I get that college is helpful, but...
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I get so much pushback when I talk about this. People tell me it’s not real or accuse me of being pro-infidelity
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I land somewhere diff on the poly thing as you know but this is like an impossible to ignore stat
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Is this an argument you would buy for other human sins? What about long term non-violence? Many men beat their wives or kids, does this mean non-violence is not a good long term goal?
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I've been pretty consistently against use of force as a very fundamental rule. We can have a lot of discussions about the benefit of human systems that don't really involve force.
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Humans didn't evolve to be monogamous but we have strong jealousy instincts that prevent poly from ever becoming mainstream. There will always be dissatisfaction.
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It is, however, quite well aligned with the needs of stable families, providing people with a generally safe childhood environment. The monogamy isn't there to primarily benefit the monogamous individual - it's for the sake of society and its replication.
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The "all or nothing" hypothesis: if lifetime monogamy isn't a solid cultural norm, it's almost impossible to do.
@MorlockP's recent thread highly relevant Of course there are large drawbacks to universal monogamy, which is why we ditched it. Question is was it worth it. - Show replies
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What about people who are in love and whose love is not impacted by some sex on the side every now and then?
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