This will probably undo/fix itself a bit once I get a regular personal sex life, but for now I feel pretty allergic to the idea of putting in effort. I want someone with effortless compatibility, which yes I'm aware is pretty unrealistic.
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You have permission to be selfish.
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AS YOU SHOULD

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Hmmm not giving a shit has seldomly lead to marvelous outcomes in my life Not saying it should never happen But maybe not the default idk
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Honestly, it's pretty normal to feel that way, especially when you don't have sex regularly (or at all). The good thing is, if you're fully open and honest, virtually all guys will try any fetish you want, even if they aren't great the first try. You'll always get their best.
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All and any? Wow you really didn't spare any unrealistic expectations
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sounds crummy for your partner.
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I wouldn't blame it on the sex work. It's probably genetic and has simply been expressed to a greater extent through sex work. I saw your dead eyes on that interview.
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to be selfless have to be selfish, this is nature's arc
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