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I think the question is whether perception of firmness comes from "this moves less when I sit on it" or from "this pushes back a lot when I sit on it", and those give different answers.
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1/ It seems to me like a redundant question because it depends on the mattress. If you're sufficiently heavy to increase density of the mattress or taution of the springs to the point where they no longer provide cushion then it will feel firmer by definition.
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I feel like firm is poorly defined because it’s an intuitive thing measuring several metrics. Depending on the metrics you are focused on(how hard is pushes on me which is constant vs how far I sink) it won’t give a consistent answer.
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Without a qualiometer, direct comparison of qualia is ill-defined. You can use a proxy, but in this case the proxy is itself in question. Ask instead: “The range of mattresses that heavy people find comfortable is _______ (firmer/softer) than the range for light people”