I hate when people use that as an argument. "Well obviously you haven't been through x or you'd agree with y"
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It’s a woowoo phrase designed to emphasize the feelings you experienced over the quantifiable facts.
End of conversation
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Absolutely. One of the best examples is abuse. I've had friends with virtually the same experience vary in their perception and impact to their lives from 'meh, he was a jerk' to needing extensive therapy.
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Can confirm. I'm one of the ones not needing therapy.
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We are not the sum of our experiences, we are the sum of our decisions and the way we choose to face those experiences.
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Also, there is no such thing as going through the same experience. Two people can have very different thoughts and feelings WHILE experiencing superficially similar circumstances (as well as reach different conclusions about their respective experiences as you validly state).
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So I never tell a friend “I know how you feel because I’ve been through it.” For example, years ago when my cat died my pain, which would have been severe regardless because I loved him immensely, was compounded by other pain in my life at the time. Only a fool would presume...
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