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In a default polyamory world with stigma against monogamy, imagine a monogamous person expressing any difficulty. "My partner cheated on me" or "Im into this other person but can't act on it" The world would use these normal flaws to mock and degrade monog people. 1/

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Aella

@Aella_Girl

Very similarly, it's dangerous to express any problems with a lifestyle that the world holds stigma against. In reality, every single lifestyle holds problems; stigma is just the line between which problems get justified and which are interpreted as signs of deep failure. 2/

5:27 PM · Nov 8, 2020

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I think this is often why persecuted subcultures get extremely sensitive to people pointing out actual flaws - they've learned that people use the flaws as a weapon, and don't trust anyone making a move towards it. This is unhelpful for everyone, and leads to stuff like -

140

Aella

@Aella_Girl

Nov 8, 2020

Everyone getting really touchy if you try to talk about stuff like race and crime. The answer to this is to stop using flaws as evidence of failure or an excuse to judge. Your identity and lifestyle are riddled with "flaws" too, you're probably just much more blind to them.

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Somebody some time ago called these “moral fashion”....whatever the society at any given time deemes moraly right. Those who do not follow the fashion are stigmatized or persecuted.

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This sounds like the kind of argument used to try justify paedophilia