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yeah i was raised in a patriarchal cult where abortion was the worst sin and women were explicitly referred to as less intelligent and brave and my entire life purpose was to become a housewife and i was subject to tons of beatings I can still fucking empathize with them.
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i used to be a fanatical fundamentalist christian who told "fags" they were going to hell and if i had only met people like you who shamed me instead of actually listening and talking with me, i would *still* be a fanatical fundamentalist christian.
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i used to be one of those terrible people you don't empathize with, and I will fight strongly for what i think is right now, but it's still so, so important to hold in mind the humanity of those who are hurting you, or you can never reach peace
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It is your job to empathize with these monsters, just as it's my job to empathize with the men who told me my purpose in life was to breed and not to think. We don't get to just turn off empathy because we've been hurt really badly.