Destabilization seems sort of inevitable if something is improving? Like, we had strong marriage norms a few decades ago but society in general was really oppressive. Society seems to be switching to value expression over stability and it makes sense this is destabilizing.
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Replying to @default_friend @Its_Katka
Yea I mean there seems to be a lot of value in there, but there's something around the way people have been talking about this value seems strange and sort of... Trying to cling to a past thing instead of adapting what they actually want
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Like, if marriage is actually good then you shouldn't have to convince people to stay in it by arguing you can't consider divorce. Maybe you should instead ask them to reflect more deeply on what they actually want
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And for a lot of people I think they actually want a dedicated marriage, and others actually don't want it. And we should be telling people to go for what they actually want, not telling people to go for a single thing we think they should want
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I'm mostly subtweeting justin right now I don't get this vibe off you
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I think I'm missing some sort of persuasive why? Like maybe you like weathering storms but how do you know this is what other people want? Why not just let their marriages fall apart? Note I find this more obvious when kids are involved
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