I'm sure there's good stuff in it but I get pretty triggered around it from seeing my mom stuck in a severely abusive marriage for 30+ years from messaging like his. And even if it was her cross to bear, me and my sisters were children who didn't deserve that.
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In my experience people have vastly overvalued the commitment of marriage, not just in my family, and it's destroyed lives. I feel compelled to say this as a counterbalance to this marriage-on-a-pedestal stuff I keep seeing lately
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Destabilization seems sort of inevitable if something is improving? Like, we had strong marriage norms a few decades ago but society in general was really oppressive. Society seems to be switching to value expression over stability and it makes sense this is destabilizing.
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Yea I mean there seems to be a lot of value in there, but there's something around the way people have been talking about this value seems strange and sort of... Trying to cling to a past thing instead of adapting what they actually want
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Like, if marriage is actually good then you shouldn't have to convince people to stay in it by arguing you can't consider divorce. Maybe you should instead ask them to reflect more deeply on what they actually want
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And for a lot of people I think they actually want a dedicated marriage, and others actually don't want it. And we should be telling people to go for what they actually want, not telling people to go for a single thing we think they should want
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I'm mostly subtweeting justin right now I don't get this vibe off you