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Aella_Girl's profile
Aella
Aella
Aella
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@Aella_Girl

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AellaVerified account

@Aella_Girl

whorelord http://aella.hns.to 

Austin
knowingless.com
Joined September 2012

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    1. Alex Kaschuta‏ @kaschuta 24 Oct 2020

      Alex Kaschuta Retweeted Aella

      I think it depends what you mean by “marriage” if the restriction of the other person’s sexuality is not part of the package. Marriage is an institution that is in part there for society, for children, it’s not just a contract between two individuals.https://twitter.com/Aella_Girl/status/1320070543375167489 …

      Alex Kaschuta added,

      AellaVerified account @Aella_Girl
      There's lots of ways partners attempt to restrict each other's behavior that's *not* condoned by society, and it feels sort of weird to me that in a post-birth-control era, we're okay with partners controlling each other's sexuality.
      Show this thread
      8 replies 3 retweets 69 likes
      Show this thread
    2. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 24 Oct 2020
      Replying to @kaschuta

      you know poly people have long-term successful marriages with kids, right? Restricting sexuality came out of the issues of pregnancy, which would def hurt preexisting kids, but today this is no longer an issue, and you can both commit to kids and express yourself sexually.

      2 replies 0 retweets 5 likes
    3. Alex Kaschuta‏ @kaschuta 24 Oct 2020
      Replying to @Aella_Girl

      I’m sure there are many such cases. But the issue remains that the goals of poly as poly are related to individual self-actualization, and the goals of traditional marriage are collective. A two parent home is still the best thing we have for the next generation.

      2 replies 0 retweets 23 likes
    4. Alex Kaschuta‏ @kaschuta 24 Oct 2020
      Replying to @kaschuta @Aella_Girl

      I think grandma is a bit different to a polycule both in genetic investment and commitment.

      2 replies 0 retweets 6 likes
    5. Alex Kaschuta‏ @kaschuta 24 Oct 2020
      Replying to @kaschuta @Aella_Girl

      I don’t think it’s nitpicky, genetic investment matters. Correlates both with good outcomes and, unfortunately, child abuse on the other end of the spectrum.

      2 replies 0 retweets 9 likes
    6. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 24 Oct 2020
      Replying to @kaschuta

      are you similarly anti adoption then?

      2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
    7. Alex Kaschuta‏ @kaschuta 24 Oct 2020
      Replying to @Aella_Girl

      I think in adoption you kind of forfeit the ‘raised by kin’ case. Isn’t that kind of the point?

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
    8. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 24 Oct 2020
      Replying to @kaschuta

      i... don't know? My point is generally, kids need a dedicated adult/group of adults who they can rely on to take care of them/be kind/supportive/etc. As long as that happens I think the kid will probably turn out fine?

      2 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
    9. Alex Kaschuta‏ @kaschuta 24 Oct 2020
      Replying to @Aella_Girl

      I think the burden of proof on that is still on the *innovators*

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
    10. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 24 Oct 2020
      Replying to @kaschuta

      this argument doesn't feel super convincing for me, can you empathize with my perspective? The nuclear family is pretty innovative and i think a solid argument can be made that it's failing kids in a lot of ways.

      2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 24 Oct 2020
      Replying to @Aella_Girl @kaschuta

      also there seem to have been long-lasting, mostly-stable cultures that operated on polygamy way back in the day, but that was probably more successful back when men died more often in wars.

      12:17 PM - 24 Oct 2020
      • 3 Likes
      • Elvon the Eldritch Error tjrwriting 🏗 Alex Kaschuta
      2 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
        1. New conversation
        2. Alex Kaschuta‏ @kaschuta 24 Oct 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl

          I think polygamy was a bit different to a modern polycule.

          1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
        3. tjrwriting  🏗‏ @tjrwriting 24 Oct 2020
          Replying to @kaschuta @Aella_Girl

          polycule probably works for Aella but feels risky to roll out to the whole society in practice it (probably) gives an option to every married person to unilaterally decide they’ll start having sex with other people

          1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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