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I don't get how offending someone means you're supposed to apologise. You can genuinely, compassionately acknowledge that you caused pain, that this is an undesirable side effect of your expression. But causing offense does not automatically equate to wrong behavior.

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Aella

@Aella_Girl

Sep 20, 2020

Ideally you apologize when you think the pain you caused to another wasn't worth the benefit you got from it, and you'd like to communicate to them they can trust you not to do it again. But so much offense doesn't fall into that category and those offenders shouldn't apologize!

141

Aella

@Aella_Girl

Very often the pain you cause to other people is worth the benefit, and that is important to recognize and protect. Taxes, protests, mocking religion, are all examples of "good" offense - clearly we don't view causing pain as uniformly a bad thing!

1:50 AM · Sep 20, 2020

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It was my understanding that when a women gets very upset by what a man has done, the man is supposed to apologize even if he doesn’t understand what he’s done wrong.

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Missed your tweets. Glad you’re back.

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Someone once said “you have the right to be offended, but you don’t have the right to not be offended” and it’s a pithy way of saying this, and it’s totally correct.

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A bird is late flying south for the winter, and as he tries to fly, he gets too cold and falls to the ground freezing. He would have surely died, except for a bull that happened across him and defecated all over the bird. The manure was disgusting, but 1/2