I have zero conscious control over the way I perceive people's gender. A woman who comes out to me as nonbinary still processes as a woman in my head; I translate it as a "woman who doesn't like being limited to standard female gender roles".
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But again, to reiterate, to them and everyone else I do pretend they're not a woman, because it's not hard to do and they want me to and it makes them happy. But inside it always feels like I'm playing pretend, like I'm participating in a game that's obviously not real.
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This isn't a deliberate thing. I'm not in the corner cackling like 'yes I will invalidate genderqueer experience I love being evil.' If the nonbinary person stopped seeming female to me in practical ways, then the game would start to feel real, and I'm 100% fine with that.
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I love the idea of a glorious transhumanist future where gender isn't real and we can switch back and forth and be whatever. I'm agender myself (or something?), very pro plastic surgery and hormones and whatever it takes to make people process you into the category you want.
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the insistence that you need to view people as they want to be seen even if it doesn't feel like something you can do or legitimately is at odds with your perception, is gaslightly and abusive and you are NOT a bad person if you can't feel the things they want you to feel
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End of conversation
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If someone wants to identify as an orange then I'll acquiesce that too. Doesn't mean I actually buy it.
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I totally agree. Personally I know there are male and females.That's it. If you want someone to call you a pear, then acknowledge it. And don't get all frustrated or pissed off when they don't. God accepts people for who they are, too bad they can't...
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I broadly agree, and that's how I see it too with one addition: they must believe that the pronouns and identity contribute significantly to changing how people see them. Which seems a bit... deluded? Maybe even manipulative. Behavior (and appearance) is the bulk of it.
Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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