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Aella_Girl's profile
Aella
Aella
Aella
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@Aella_Girl

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@Aella_Girl

whorelord http://aella.hns.to 

Austin
knowingless.com
Joined September 2012

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    1. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 31 Aug 2020

      I'm tryin to figure something out so here's a bunch of words as I try to work through it: Sometimes, people talk in a group as though they are speaking a podcast at you; I call it 'podiuming'; they have interactions with you not to have a discourse, but rather as a bouncing-

      16 replies 3 retweets 147 likes
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    2. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 31 Aug 2020

      off to sort of 'get out' what they wanted to say. This can be great if done well and the person is interesting, and annoying if they don't. It's like they're giving a speech. Lately, I've been noticing that all the people I find to podium are men, and I'm reorienting to -

      1 reply 0 retweets 58 likes
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    3. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 31 Aug 2020

      viewing podiuming as a masculine activity because of this. This is weird! But then I was listening to a lady talk and she was doing basically the same thing - taking up a lot of space, not "doing discourse", getting a lot of information off her chest, but the feel of it was-

      2 replies 0 retweets 38 likes
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    4. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 31 Aug 2020

      really different. She mentioned emotions and sensations far more, she was careful and complimentary and a lot of her speech was much more positively valenced. She was talking about some way of interpersonally seeing the world. And I'm confused about a few things - one,

      1 reply 0 retweets 39 likes
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    5. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 31 Aug 2020

      Why do I feel like podiuming is male, and that she wasn't podiuming, even though she was doing a lot of similar things? Podiuming usually annoys me. She also annoyed me a lot. I felt viscerally repulsed by her words. @rothosphere mentioned this sounded like archetypes -

      5 replies 0 retweets 34 likes
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    6. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 31 Aug 2020

      they were both doing the same type of role (e.g., parent), but with extremely different directions (e.g., father/mother). Maybe it's just more infrequent for women to podium? Maybe my sample size is just really low so I'm tryin to spin patterns out of not enough data? -

      2 replies 0 retweets 33 likes
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    7. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 31 Aug 2020

      Regardless, I've definitely started noticing more gender differences in conversational behavior lately. Men tend to be more aggressive/space taking, and women tend to... i'm having a lot of 'i don't like women's tendencies' feelings when writing this tweet rn. -

      3 replies 0 retweets 44 likes
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      Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 31 Aug 2020

      I think I feel much less safe around women. I think I anticipate they're more likely to kick me out of groups or not listen to what I say or make decisions based on interpersonal tides rather than something consistent. I wonder if this is true or just my own biases?

      12:37 AM - 31 Aug 2020
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      12 replies 0 retweets 85 likes
        1. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 31 Aug 2020

          And I'm not just asking that question - I am legitimately open to this being my own biases. If you think it's actually true and not a bias thing I'd like to hear how you also seriously evaluated it being a bias yet came to the opposite conclusion.

          21 replies 1 retweet 48 likes
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        1. TrueNinj‏ @Robinisgofish 31 Aug 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl

          Men will be hiding less feelings. More predictable.

          0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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        2. Bitcoin Eagle ∞/21M‏ @bitcoin_eagle 31 Aug 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl

          In a group of women they all tend to agree on a decision unanimously and that gives them power in unity. That means that what individual woman says she wants is highly context dependent.

          1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
        3. Pirkka-Joose Sempé 27 5'3''‏ @pjsempe 31 Aug 2020
          Replying to @bitcoin_eagle @Aella_Girl

          You've got a point. I've often seen that when debating what to do with a group of women, there's some kind of pressure to find a consensus before having things done, which I often don't feel with my fellow males (which can be a problem, with poor coordination sometimes)

          0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        4. End of conversation
        1. Jeroen D‏ @Yerune_D 31 Aug 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl

          In general, men get to fight physically, women socially.

          0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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        1. Giulio Giacomo Cantone‏ @JayCanto 31 Aug 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl

          It's true because you are an over average attractive woman. Is the same reason why less than average assertive men prefer to interact with women.

          0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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        2. iorena‏ @limitoftruth 31 Aug 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl

          I think it's not controversial to say that from early childhood, girls' social interactions tend to have more complex rules than boys'. If boys have beef, they fight to sort it out, but girls play way more nebulous games involving lying, talking behind backs, spreading rumors

          1 reply 0 retweets 7 likes
        3. iorena‏ @limitoftruth 31 Aug 2020
          Replying to @limitoftruth @Aella_Girl

          At least this has been my experience growing up. I also feel "safer" being friends with men these days, but I think it's just trauma from interactions with girls at school. I'm kind of scared of women and that I come off as stupid because I don't know all the right things to say

          1 reply 0 retweets 5 likes
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        2. Jason Dusek‏ @sanshibanrei 31 Aug 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl

          In the Origin of Species, Darwin says that it's the most similar creatures that are in the harshest competition with one another. They are in the same environment with the same strategies. Our harshest competitors are members of our own species. (1/2)

          1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
        3. Jason Dusek‏ @sanshibanrei 31 Aug 2020
          Replying to @sanshibanrei @Aella_Girl

          Women are your toughest competitors. They overlap with your niche -- your combination of strategy and environment -- the most. Some say women shouldn't compete with one other; but women are very different from other primate females -- the competition is actually robust. (2/2)

          1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
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