what's a narrative currently popular among your ingroup that you personally don't buy?
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but you don't have to have a monogamous agreement in order to only want each other.
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I actually think viewing poly/mono preferences closer to the lense of sexuality clears things up. My girlfriend doesn't want to control me either, but if I chop off my weiner, and she breaks up with me, I'd totally get it. Same with poly/mono preferences.
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no civilization in history has ever existed without making a rule of partners attempting to control each others' sexual and romantic behavior given this, you may wish to review your logic
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This is what drives the modern tradition of "small (no kids allowed please), clandestine beach destination weddings." Large weddings are a Nash equilibrium solution for constructive reinforcement of longevity in monogamous relationships.
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