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When I was younger, I was much more aggressive, conservative, and hostile. I once asked someone a 'debate' question around a touchy topic, ready to fight; she responded neutrally, well-considered, and asked gentle, clarifying questions. That snapped me out of it - permanently. 1/

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In witnessing someone just patiently take my attack and not attack back, it radically shifted my perspective on what discussions could be like. I suddenly saw that I'd been holding a 'war' mentality, not a 'discover truth together' mentality. 2/

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Replying to

They didn't change my mind, they changed how I approached the conversation..

10:43 PM · Aug 21, 2020