through a lot of world travel, through doing a lot of acid (at 22). I was in a few documentaries and interviewed by Playboy, including performing at the Playboy mansion. I also used my audience to get into surveys and data analysis. Eventually I got hired by a crypto company. 6/
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I had to quit camming to work for the company, but I was burned out, so I did. From 25-26 I worked there but found out I had no idea how to operate in a "normal company" and was bad at it and didn't like it. I eventually quit, and helped found askhole.io 7/
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26+ I've been nonsexual online, as probably most of you following me have found. I don't post porn, I post 'weird questions' and 'sometimes essays.' I've found moving out of sex work has increased the amount people take me seriously, which I sort of didn't expect. 8/
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Maybe this is naive, but I'd been immersed in the sex work world for so long and from such an early age that it just seemed default to me and I wasn't ashamed of it and wasn't treated worse because of it. So quitting camming and watching my "reputation" or whatever get better 9/
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was pretty weird. Suddenly verified accounts were following me, and I was getting requests to be on good upstanding podcasts.
But now, I'm in a position now where financially, it makes sense for me to start returning to sex work (Onlyfans). This has put me in a weird spot. 10/
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I suddenly am *afraid* of reputation loss for sex work, which is bizarre because this sensation is new. I'm afraid of being dismissed or taken less seriously. I'm uncomfortable because sex work requires some level of suspension of authenticity that now feels very- 11/
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incompatible with the very unfiltered way I am on twitter and my blog. It feels weird to be so open about myself now and also to be making money off my body and an exaggerated sex drive. I don't really know how to handle this - my confusion is showing up in inconsistent- 12/
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pricing and messaging around my Onlyfans content. I don't know how explicit to be, how dirty to make the talk.
I have faith I'll figure this out, but right now my experience around the upstanding Aella and the sex-worker Aella is disjointed and really weird. /end.
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oh yeah i would take acid and then get real confused. I would often look at my breasts and go "what are these. why do they have so much power? i don't know what these are"
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o yea i thought about that just not on acid. I mean i've written a lot about sexual value and gender dynamics on my blog.
I don't know what's 'good' for society. It seems to be a result of drives, and I usually think letting people fulfill their drives is good.
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