I wonder how much of my difficulty understanding nonbinary identities comes from having been in sex work for sooo long, where the genitals you have are incredibly important to how you're treated and the role you play.
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I feel like there are a whole wealth of human interactions that are not "paying for or being paid for sex/porn" which do not rely on this categorization.
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I think there's a lot of human interactions which aren't being paid for sex/porn that do also rely on this categorization.
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it's also mind-boggling for me and at this point i consider myself nonbinary
male and female categories seem to fit most people pretty comfortably but if i try to apply them internally the output is ????????? -
I present as male, but it doesn't make much internal difference. I mostly do it because it's easier than dealing with the confusion of others. I've heard this called "cis by default": I'm maybe NB, but I don't have enough feelings about it to identify by it.
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It’s not that all of them are saying that no category applies, it’s that binary gender gender doesn’t necessarily apply. It makes sense to me that something as overwhelmingly intricate and ambiguous as the human experience and psyche could be more nuanced than “A or B.”
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There’s so much variety to human experience that it would be shocking to me if this one thing was that simple.
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I very much doubt that non binary people don't believe that certain parts of themselves fit into each side of a gender binary, but rather that it's such an ambiguous uneven fit that they feel uncomfortable identifying themselves in either category.
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To me it makes sense to compare non binary individuals with bisexuals. It's not that they don't lie anywhere on any spectrum in any way, but that the confines of what is the agreed upon boundary for cis/trans or het/homo doesn't allow them a comfortable definition as either.
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