I wonder how much of my difficulty understanding nonbinary identities comes from having been in sex work for sooo long, where the genitals you have are incredibly important to how you're treated and the role you play.
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In this context, if an afab said she wasn't a woman, id be like, that's nice but that means nothing. People are still going to pay you because of the way you look. Saying you're not a woman has no impact on all the things that are important about being a woman
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Maybe in a world where there's not really different treatment of people based on the way they look, nonbinary identities make more intuitive sense?
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This would maybe predict that nonbinary identities are more common in more gender-equal worlds, or worlds where there's a strong insistence that genders be treated the same.
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My roommate wants to know if you have the same incomprehension of binary trans people since presumably they would have the same mismatch between genitals and "role", except if they get very rare/expensive surgery.
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Not really. The thing that makes men want to pay is often "the appearance of woman", which trans people can have if they pass hard enough.
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This might be a little reductive, but even in sex work, there are niches outside the binary? E.g. you brought up Buck Angel. Trans performers of many stripes, trap/crossdressing, furries etc... and, depending on def. of sex work, text/drawn/cgi porn.
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Buck Angel isn't nonbinary though, he's very much operating inside the binary.
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Your biologically primed understanding of gender is distorted by constructed gender identities. This has nothing to do with your line of work, gather with being a human being.
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maybe your difficulty stems from the fact that nonbinary identities make absolutely no sense from definition?
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