I'm not telling them what they are, I'm telling them the gender *I process them as*.
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I assume he killed himself because he was forced into a gender role he didn't want - forced to wear clothes he didn't want, to act a way he didn't want, and expected to have a sexuality he didn't have.
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As I've been clear in my original thread, I strongly support people being able to have whatever gender expression they want, to dress and act and love whoever they want, however they want.
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?? Lots of people kill themselves over not getting what they want, and we'd consider that needs. For example, friendship, closeness, a sense of belonging, love. Are those 'wants' or 'needs'? I don't understand what you're arguing here.
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I don't understand what you're arguing. I don't think I actually disagree with you. What David went through was horrible, he was forced to act like someone he wasn't, and he killed himself. Why are we debating want vs need?
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Nobody 'is' anything. We have no core; we're mammals that react to the world around us. I want our experiences to be good and I try to act in ways that make that happen. I use the right pronouns, I advocate for trans rights, I learn about the pain they go through.
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But nobody "is' anything. I'm not anything. I am a story held together by a few plot points in my life, and so is everybody. Gender is a story, and all stories can be questioned.